You just have to read this one.
If you missed the past group lists - here they are:
100 Posts - What a Fun but Colossal Waste of Time!
200 Posts – The Men With the Nets Haven’t Caught Me Yet!
300 Posts – Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid
Due to the success of the all the current marathons Disney announced a new kind of marathon last week.
The new marathon has a brutal course that only the physically and mentally strong stand any chance of finishing. In fact many are saying that course is impossible and that no human being can endure such punish ment.
“We’ve developed a marathon that we believe no one can finish,” stated Disney spokes-robot WALL-E.
The course consists of the following path and tasks:
1 - Run from the entrance of the
2 - Ride “It’s a Small World.”
3 - Run to “Stitch’s Great Escape.”
4 - Ride “Stitch’s Great Escape.”
5 - Repeat steps two through four three times.
6 – Run to Epcot.
7 – Run to the
8 – Enter the exit of “Maelstrom” and just watch the movie.
9 – Run to the “Imagination Pavilion.”
10 – Ride the awful imagination ride.
11 – Repeat steps seven through ten three times.
12 – Run to “
13 – Ride “Mission Space” six times in a row
14 – Stagger back to the
15 – Run to the “Tiki Room Under New Management”
16 – View the “Tiki Room Under New Management”
17 – Cross the finish line which is the exit of the ride
It’s currently unknown if the physical or mental aspect of the marathon will eliminate the most competitors. Being forced to ride the worst rides in Disney World is painful if you only have to do it once. Being forced to do it over and over while exhausting ones self will most likely prove fatal.
Everyone knows I don’t like Stiches Great Escape. However, as I’ve stated before that ride is fixable. I can also name about a dozen other rides that really miss the mark and need help but there is one I think is beyond help.
To put it simply, Mission Space is a one ride wonder. The first time you ride it you think it’s entertaining. The second time you ride it (if it doesn’t make you sick the first time) you realize that it’s really a crummy ride. The preshow stinks. The story stinks. The waiting area stinks. The ride is a glorified Turkish Twist only not as exciting. In fact the only thing I enjoy about Mission Space is the queue.
Of course since Mission Space is considered a thrill ride and it cost oodles of money to build I don’t think it’s going anywhere anytime soon. I say that but the first crack is showing in its armor. That crack being the fact that I’ve never waited in line on Mission Space and I do the “Orange Team.” That is not a good sign when you consider its next door neighbor, Test Track, always has a line and it’s a much older ride.
There is only one ride in Epcot I can think of with a shorter wait than Mission Space and that’s the Imagination ride. You know you are in trouble when you can be compared to that ride.
The real killer just occurred to me when my mother asked me if she should go on Mission Space when on her next Disney vacation. I said no. I really could not recommend it to my mother and she’s been on everything else in Disney World.
The saddest part is, you could have a killer ride with a space theme. Space is such a diverse and exotic subject you’d think the Imagineers would have a field day with it.
I know some people might not agree with this but I’d like to see a good old fashion space themed dark ride that goes through the history of space exploration and some future possibilities. I think that would have more shelf life that Mission Space currently has.
Over the years many celebrities have appeared in rides via a video, voiceover, or even audio-animatronics.
Today (that means now) which are the best appearances in Disney World? Which are the worst? Let’s review a few and find out:
Good – Johnny Depp aka Captain Jack Sparrow Animatronic – Pirates of the
Bad – Ellen Degeneres Animatronic – Ellen’s Energy Adventure: I’m not a big Ellen fan. She’s ok in the show parts of this ride but her animatronic in the dinosaur scene is awful! I hate it. It ruins that part of the ride. Don’t worry though, this rides days are numbered.
Good – Patrick Warburton – Soarin Preshow: I like his appearance in this. It’s a dorky, almost sarcastic performance. It reminds me a lot of the character he played in Seinfeld.
Bad – Gary Sinise – Mission Space preshow: He’s flatter than a pancake in this video. I don’t know if it’s the script or what but this is awful.
Good - Eric Idle – Imagination with Figment and Honey I Shrunk the Audience: Face it the best part about either of these two out dated, awful attractions is Eric Idle.
Good - Paul Rubens – Star Tours: Peewee Herman was the perfect fit for the goofy robot pilot.
Good - Aerosmith – Rockin’ Roller Coaster: Aerosmith is a good fit for this ride. It’s a lame story but it works.
Neutral - Judy Dench – Spaceship Earth: Judy Dench does a good job. The script isn’t bad. The problem is she replaced back to back fantastic voiceovers. Hers just doesn’t match up.
Bad – The Yeti – Expedition Everest: If you are going to retire from ransacking camps and scaring hikers at least have the decency to move. Standing there while a strobe light is flashed on you is just lame. Thanks for mailing in your performance.