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Thursday, September 9, 2010

Attraction Review: The Circle of Life

When I was doing all of my attraction reviews I somehow forgot about this one. Maybe it was because I blocked it from my permanent memory.

The Circle of Life is a movie located inside the Land Pavilion. If you are walking in through the door it’s located on the right hand side of the building.

The theater itself is surprisingly large. I was really shocked at how big this theater was. I didn’t realize how much room there was on that side of the pavilion. The waiting area isn’t bad and there is a brief preshow displayed on some old school tube TVs. That was the first sign that this is an older attraction.

Inside the theater the seats seem like they are in decent shape and it’s comfortable enough. You’ll hear the cast member give the normal spiel about moving all the way down your row. You can ignore this for the most part. There just isn’t that much of a demand for this attraction. I’d be amazed if even during peak attendance days this becomes an issue.

Believe it or not I just described the good stuff. The movie is rather boring and very preachy. It’s all about man destroying the Earth. It starts with Timon damming up a river to build a new resort and Pumba trying to explain why that’s not a good idea. Please stop and think about that for a minute. Now think about where you are sitting. Hypocrites! I like Disney but that really cracked me up. Why not just make a movie that says “Don’t do what we did. It’s bad.” I realize Disney is a very green company now and they do a lot to support the environment so please send the hate mail somewhere else. I’m just saying it’s very ironic.

There is another problem with this movie beyond the fact that it’s preachy and boring. It suffers from NS also known as Norway Syndrome. Norway Syndrome is a disease that convinces you that by turning up the volume you make something more exciting. That’s why the movie in Norway is so loud. It’s also why this movie will almost make your ears bleed. It’s amazing the speakers don’t blow out.

If you like boring movies that are preachy and insanely loud, you’ll love The Circle of Life! If you like Pumba and Timon don’t see this movie because you’ll want to cry. It’s the same reason you shouldn’t go on Stich’s Great Escape if you like Stich.

If you really have nothing better to do or really want to be able to say you did all the attractions then go see this movie. Just don’t complain to me after.

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