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Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Grumpy Flies Defamation Suit

Grumpy, the famous “little person” from Snow White and the Seven Dwarves fame, has filed a defamation suit and is seeking damages for what he calls “character assignation.”

The suit states that use of the term Little Person is offensive and should be discontinued. The suit also draws attention to the fact that a “little person” refers to a human of small stature and is not as appropriate term for non-humans.

“When will people get it through their heads?!? I’m not a human, I’m a dwarf! Do you find people calling Gimli from the Lord of the Rings fame a human? NO! Does R. A. Salvatore call his characters who are dwarves, little people? NO! Stop calling me a little person!” Grumpy ranted at a recent press conference.

The suit is seeking 100 Trillion in damages from anyone who has ever called Grumpy a little person and is also seeking to remove all references of “little people” from anything related to Snow White and the Seven….Short, Stocky, Non-Humans.

“Snow White never called us “little people.” She was intelligent enough to know we weren’t human. Why do you think none of us other than Dopey ever made romantic advances towards her?!? Maybe it’s because she’s not a dwarf and we’re not human! Dopey only did because he’s an idiot and thought she was just a really tall dwarf,” Grumpy told a reporter from the Toon Town Gazette.

The suit is expected to reach the courts sometime in August. Until then everyone is urged to avoid using the term “little person” in reference to Grumpy.

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