Disney Year in Review

I’m a little late getting this post out.  By now everyone must be sick to death of all of the “end of year” reviews out there. Don’t let that stop you from reading.  If you’ve ever read this blog before you know I’m a few sandwiches short of a picnic. 

I’m not going to do an in depth overview of the year.  I’m going to do a hit list of the events that made an impression on me.

Give a Day Get a Day: This was a great idea and that was proven by the fact it ran out in a blink of an eye.  I guess the only real drawback of this promotion was the fact that a lot of people who wanted to participate in it could not because it ran out so fast.

Epic Mickey: It was a game with so much promise.  It was a game with everything going for it.  It was a game that fell so short of the mark it made me sad. The only thing that made it even worse was Warren Spector’s, slap in the face, remarks about how everyone was wrong.  The game was good people just didn’t know how to play it or understand what they were trying to do.  I guess I should thank him for letting us know how stupid we are.

D23 Price Drop: This was a step in the right direction but still not what needed to be done to fix D23.  If you want to know how to fix D23 just search my blog for “D23.” I do have to say that I think Disney stole part of my idea.  I just wish they’d steal the entire idea.

Alice in Wonderland: I saw this move and I liked this movie.  In fact it was the only movie I saw in the theater this year.  I’m not sure how it broke a billion but I’m happy it did.  This movie was a welcome surprise.

Captain EO Returns: I have really mixed feelings about this.  Captain EO was awesome when I was a kid.  I got to see it less than a year after it opened in Epcot.  I’m a huge fan of the old school Epcot.  Out of all the things they could have brought back this wouldn’t have been on the top of my list.  What bugs me is the only reason it came back was because Michael Jackson died.  If Michael was still alive Captain EO would still be sitting on a shelf.

Power Ranges Get Dumped: YES! WOOOHOOO! I hated seeing the power rangers in DHS.  I don’t have to worry about that anymore.

Prince Charming’s Carousal: I declare this the official “Say what?!?” Disney moment of the year.  I’d use another term but this is a mostly family friendly blog.  This just happened.  Why?  We don’t know.  How many people know the story and name changed? Almost no one knows.  Why?  Disney didn’t make a big deal about it.  So again, why?

Summer Nightastic: It had an annoying song that got stuck in your head and they messed up the Tower of Terror for a while.  Oh, they also brought back some kind of parade I remember watching when I was eight.

Development for the Rich: I refuse to even mention its name.  This was an awful move.  People shouldn’t live on Disney World property. The problem is Disney is supposed to be for everyone and every family not just the people who wipe their butts with hundred dollar bills.

Doggie Hotel: Why does a dog need a tv and story time?  Sorry I have to stop thinking about this.  My head is starting to hurt.

Toy Story 3: Great move but it had the darkest scene I’ve seen in any Disney movie.  I have to say the landfill scene actually shocked me.  It’s still a top notch movie.

CMDTA Raids Disney: Somehow Disney survived another raid by CMDTA.  New Hampshire didn’t though.  The second biggest ice storm in NH history hit :P

There were a lot of other subjects but I these were the ones I wanted to mention. 

Epic Mickey – Epic Fail

When I heard about Epic Mickey I was excited.  That feeling only grew as more and more info leaked out about the game.  I couldn’t wait to play it once it arrived.  Boy was I disappointed.

Epic Mickey has a decent story, great location, great design, tons of Disney goodness, but the controls are so dysfunctional it’s barely playable.

The controls are so frustrating my wife stopped playing it after 20 minutes has hasn’t returned to it again.  She didn’t just get frustrated she got mad.  In her own words she said “It’s a great game but the controls just don’t work.”

Since then my wife has been playing “Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit.”  I had to mention that because most people would say a Need for Speed game would have to be more difficult than a Mickey game.  Normally you would be right but not this time.

The big problem with the controls boil down to two areas; The camera, and the response.

The camera is never in the right place. You will find yourself always adjusting the camera.  This gets really annoying when you have a bad guy beating you up.  The camera also becomes fixed in places, which makes it very hard to judge distances.  You’ll find yourself falling and dying often because of this.

The response is a whole different issue.  More times then I could count I’d find Mickey not moving even though I pushing a button or direction.  I’d often find that I had to back up and push the direction again.

If you can ignore the awful controls Epic Mickey is awesome and has a lot of fun mechanics.  It can be so much fun that I’d still give this game a mediocre three out of five if you are a Disney fan. 

Let me explain why I give this three out of five.  If this game had good controls it would be a 5 out of 5 game.  If this game had the same controls and no Disney it would be a 1 out of 5.  Knowing that, my advice would be to rent this game, don’t buy it.

Time for another Reboot

Rebooting or remaking a film or turning a ride or video game into a film seems like the in thing to do. My guess is most of the movie studios are too lazy or too scared to come up with something new.

Look at Disney. I think they almost pioneered the idea. We had three movies based off of Pirates of the Caribbean, one movie based on the Haunted Mansion, a movie based on the Price of Persia video game, a new Tron movie, a remake of A Christmas Carroll and a recently announced reboot of the failed Haunted Mansion movie.

If you are going to do something, do something different. Let’s step it up a notch. Here are some rides, movies, and games that would be fun to see:

Swiss Family Robinson: Look how popular Lost was. Now imagine if it didn’t have a crappy ending and it took place a in the 1800’s so you could have pirates too. You already have an attraction in the Magic Kingdom to support it too. Can you say GOLD MINE?

Tom Sawyer: When was the last time someone did a fun Tom Sawyer movie? That’s right you can’t remember can you. That means it’s a good time to do one. Like the Swiss Family Robinson, you already have an attraction for it.

Epic Mickey: If the game is a success don’t wait - bang out an animated film. Who doesn’t want to see Mickey Mouse in a movie?

Space Mountain: You think I’m nuts? Think again. You could easily do a fun movie based around the day to day operations of a large space port.

The Jungle Cruise: Make this a comedy and throw some references to the ride in there and you have a great low budget movie.

The Pioneer Players: With the success of Red Dead Redemption and Glee (yes I just mentioned them in the same sentence) the time is great for a western comedy loaded with music.

The Country Bear Jamboree: Somehow you managed to make a Country Bears movie that was just awful. I didn’t think that was possible but you did it. Why not actually do a good story this time?

Expedition Everest: Do I need to say more? Maybe we could actually see the Yeti move in the movie.

Kilimanjaro Safaris – The Hunt for Big Red: The story didn’t work for a ride because we didn’t want a ride we wanted to look at animals. However a movie could work.

That’s just a few ideas. I’m sure there are a ton of others. Just don’t do a Tiki Room movie. That would be awful.

Grand Theft Mickey

In response to complaints that “Epic Mickey” was toned down and not as dark as originally planed, Disney announced last week that they are working on a new video game featuring Mickey Mouse.

“Grand Theft Mickey” will take place in a sandbox version of Disney World. The sandbox will similar in scope to the worlds found in Rockstar’s Grand Theft Auto and Red Dead Redemption video games.

The story starts with Mickey finding out that Donald Duck has kidnapped Minnie and is holding her for ransom. Instead of paying the ransom, Mickey goes on an epic rampage throughout Disney World while trying to locate Donald.

Throughout the story Mickey has to enlist other classic characters to help him in his quest. He’ll do this by doing various tasks and quests for the characters. In one case, to enlist the aide of Goofy, Mickey has to “handle” a number of people who have been making fun of Goofy. These people turn out of be the Seven Dwarfs who you hunt down one by one. You are given the choice to either beat up the dwarfs, accept a bribe from them and take “proof” you’ve “taken care” of them, or capture them alive and return them to Goofy who will then imprison them in his jail until they decide to stop making fun of him.

Like most typically sandbox games there will also be numerous mini-games and random events throughout the world. Some of the mini games include: Monorail Driving, Bus Driver, Ride Photo Screening, “It’s a Small World” Target Practice, A photography game where you capture certain guest events (like a child melting down) and landmarks, and a fireworks game.

There is also a morals system built into the game. It’s not your typical moral system. Your actions either make you a Fan Favorite or a Disney Villain. There is second area that is tracked to determine how much you influence others. For example, if you choose to beat up the dwarfs you remain neutral in the FF or DV area but you become more influential. If you take the bribe you become more of a DV but do not gain any influence. If you return the dwarfs to Goofy you become more of a FF but do not gain any influence.

Your standing as an FF or DV determines who you can enlist to help you. If you are a FF you can enlist Goofy, Pluto, Peter Pan, and other popular characters. If you are a DV you can enlist Ursula, The Witch, Captain Barbosa, and other classic Disney Villains.

Your influence level determines how people react to you. If your influence is low people will not believe what you say or they won’t want to help you. With a high influence people respect you, believe everything you say, and will help you without any questioning.

There is a rather high level of violence in the game. However, you cannot kill guests or cast members (but you can beat them up and take their loot thereby sending them to first aid). You cannot “kill” characters either but injuring them requires them to be send to the animation department to be redrawn or to the costume department to be re-stitched.

The game is expected to be out for the holiday season and be released on all the major consoles. Early estimates are showing that Grand Theft Mickey could be a mega hit.

(If you didn’t figure it out by now this is a fake news report. However, I’d love to see this game. If you want it, complain to Disney. Maybe we’ll get lucky.)

Epic Mickey the Mickey Mouse Video Game

Forget what you know about Mickey Mouse video games. Mickey Mouse running around doing fun things with furry critters is a thing of the past. Junction Point Studios is developing a game for the Nintendo Wii called “Epic Mickey.”

I owned a Wii once. I sold it because I never played it. Maybe if Epic Mickey was out back then I’d still have it. It sounds good but it could alienate a lot of Mickey Mouse fans.

Basically the game takes place in a post apocalypse Disney World. There are messed up versions of Cinderella’s Castle and Spaceship Earth. Everything is going to have a steampunk theme to it including overhauls of Goofy, Mickey and other classic characters.

I know they say that life can imitate art or I guess art can imitate art. As some of you know I’ve often put Oswald the Lucky Rabbits in my blog as an evil, vengeful, criminal mastermind. I am not kidding when I say that Oswald the Lucky Rabbit is the bad guy in the new game. Some of you may also remember a post I did that involved a bunch of forgotten characters who teamed up and formed a gang. The irony is the premise of the game involves a bunch of lesser known characters trying to overthrow Mickey.

To prove I’m not kidding here is a direct quote from eurogamer:

“The antagonists of Epic Mickey are the largely old and obscure Disney elements, including theme park rides and older cartoons. Having been forgotten, they are now trapped in a "forgotten world of broken machines and bitter personalities." Running this world is Oswald the Lucky Rabbit, one of Walt Disney's first creations, who has become jealous of Mickey Mouse and is seeking revenge. Oswald sends the Phantom Blot to the Disney universe, and it soon covers the world with black ink, causing the colors to run. Using a variety of artist tools, Mickey must return the Disney world to its former glory.”

I really hope this comes out for the PS3 too. This game sounds whacked enough to be either really good or utterly awful. I’d also like to say, if someone from Disney is reading this do you think you could do some of my legitimate ideas instead of taking my ridiculous posts and turning them into video games?