Kodak Flees the Scene

Years after funding the worst ride overhaul in the history of Walt Disney World, Kodak has ended their sponsorship of the Imagination Pavilion.

There is a long, well documented history of the downward spiral of this pavilion. I encourage everyone to look into it. It’s quite the story and less believable than half the stuff I write on this blog.

The best overview was done by the guys over at Walt Disney World News Today. They did a back to the future episode on the imagination pavilion that was epic.

I had a good laugh when I heard that Kodak had ended its sponsorship. Why? Because they didn’t state a reason for ending the sponsorship. For once a company just laid it out like it was. They didn’t need to state a reason. Everyone knows why they dropped it. If you don’t know why then ask yourself who would want to sponsor that pavilion. The answer is simple – NO ONE!

It’s a real shame too. From the outside it’s the most attractive pavilion in Future world. It’s too bad the inside is rotten to the core.

The other sad thing about Kodak pulling out is the history involved. Since Epcot opened Kodak has been there. They’ve been a huge supporter of Disney through the years. I bought my first camera and film from a Kodak booth in Epcot when I was a kid. I know times have changed and Kodak is a shell of what they once were but it’s always hard to say goodbye to someone you’ve been with for over twenty years.

Miracle Ear Must Have Boosted Their Sponsorship

I know Miracle Ear is not an “official” sponsor of Disney but I am now convinced that they are paying big bucks to get Disney to crank the volume. I swear Disney is much louder now that it was before.

La Nouba: This show is very loud, far too loud. Not only that they have signs that say they have equipment for the hard of hearing. If you can’t hear this show, check your pulse because you are most likely dead. They should have noise canceling headphones for the rest of us so we don’t go deaf.

The Circle of Life: Wow. That’s all I can say about this one is wow. It’s so loud it hurts. I guess because the movie is awful and preachy they thought it would add some excitement if they cranked the volume. It’s either that or the cast member in charge id deaf.

Journey Into Imagination: This ride is bad to begin with. It didn’t need to be louder but they made it much louder. I am glad my wife didn’t go on this ride with me. She had a headache so skipped it. This ride would have killed her.

Dinosaur: I’ve never noticed this being a really loud ride but my wife can’t stand parts of it because it hurts her ears. Our ride photo was identical because she’s shying away from the sonic boom that hits you when the dinosaur charges you.

Those are just the worst offenders. There are many more. I am not kidding when I say my wife and I are planning on bring ear plugs for our next trip.

The Hall of Presidents, Brought to You by Depends.

Disney loves to get sponsors for its rides, shows, and anything else you could stick a name on. A lot of sponsors have come and go throughout the years. One sponsor recently caught me off guard. Hanes sponsors the Rockin Roller Coaster. When I thought about that I started to laugh. The sad part is Hanes is not using this sponsorship to its full potential. What they need to do is open an under ware stand at the exit of the ride and put a sign above it that says “Replace your soiled undies here!” Come on! It’s a trill ride. They could print “Rockin Roller Coaster Replacement Undies” on all of them. They’d make a killing.

That got me thinking of other missed opportunities. Here are a few I’d like to see:

The Hall of Presidents Sponsored by Depends. This is a natural fit. The people who enjoy this ride the most are Depends target demographic. It’s also a long show. They could sell them at the entrance and exit. That way no one would have to worry about taking a potty break. As Jim Carey put it so eloquently in Dumb and Dumber “Just go man.”

The Mad Tea Party sponsored by Schweppes Ginger Ale. Why not a motion sickness pill maker? Simple, that’s not good business. If you sell the pills to someone who is in line, only so many people will buy them. Motion sickness pills don’t really work after the fact so selling them at the exit isn’t a great idea. However, letting everyone get sick and then selling them ginger ale at an increased price is a sure thing. If your sales start to slip, crank up the ride a notch!

It’s a Small World sponsored by Smith and Wesson. If you think this is an odd match you’re not thinking of it from the business side of things. A majority of the people who are dragged onto this ride are doing so because they have kids or some fruit loop who loves dolls in their group. By the end of the ride guess what kind of mood they’ll be in. A gun buying mood!

The Universe of Energy sponsored by Miracle Ear. This is a perfect fit. This ride is so loud that you’ll need a Miracle Ear by the time it’s over. All you need to do is setup a kiosk at the exit and you’ll make millions.

Swiss Family Tree House sponsored by Kraft. Why Kraft? Simple, today’s kids are dumb. Chances are they don’t know who the Swiss Family Robinson are and if they do they probably don’t know they are called Swiss because they are from Switzerland. I bet 80% of people under 25 think they were called Swiss because they were cheese makers. You might as well profit off of their stupidity.