CMDTA’s Top Ten Movies

A ton of different organizations and companies have done list of what they feel are the top ten films of all time. Most of them have the same thing in common. They ignore the common man and only really care about the critics. Those lists remind me a lot of Oscars. I never watch the Oscars because I know I won’t give a rats backside about the movies that win.
I decided to come up with a real top ten list. A list that will prove once and for all that I am nuts. Some of the movies on this list will dumb found you. You might also be surprised by the range of movies.


1. Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels (1998) – This movie is all about the story. You’ll be hard pressed to find a better written movie. This is a movie that you have to watch a few times just to figure out what happened but when realize the complexity of what happened if blows you away.


2. Alien (1979) – I saw Alien when I was a kid and it scared the pants off me. When I found out it was made before I was born I was shocked. No movie before Alien treated horror and sci-fi like this film did. This movie set a new standard that countless films since have tried to match.


3. Forest Gump (1994) – “Forest Gump” is one of those movies that will make you laugh and five minutes later make you cry. It’s one of those movies that just makes you smile in the end.


4. Monty Python and the Search for the Holy Grail (1975) – Its budget was so small they couldn’t afford credits at the end, people said it was an utterly silly movie, and then it gained a cult following that cemented Monty Python in legend status. Try and think of a movie that people quote more frequently. Find a movie with a higher cost to profit ratio. Find a movie with a more amazing development story. Despite the odds this movie made it.


5. Mary Poppins (1964) – You can’t go wrong with Mary Poppins. The style of this movie was great. It was exciting. It was funny. It was everything you’d want out of a family movie. In a word it is magical.


6. Dumb and Dumber (1994) – The name says it all. This movie is dumb. It might be the dumbest movie of all time. People say it’s disgusting and crude. There is one thing they are forgetting. It’s the most perfect display of toilet humor ever made.


7. Up (2009) – Why did I put “Up” in my top ten? It’s a good movie but what really sends this one over the edge is its ability to pull on your heart. No animated movie made me cry in my adult life until this one. The montage in the beginning is one of the best pieces of film making in any movie.


8. Miracle (2004) – This is one of those movies that no one has seen. It’s about the 1980 US Olympic Ice Hockey Team and how they won the gold. If you ever need a feel good movie go see this one. What this movie does well is merging actual footage with movie footage. It makes you feel like you are there.


9. Blazing Saddles (1974) – This movie offended everyone too stupid to see the forest through the trees. In reality this wasn’t a racist movie, it was a movie that proved how stupid racist people are. At first you don’t want to laugh but then the person next to you laughs and you lose it. Enjoy this movie because you could never make another one in the super sensitive world we live in.


10. It’s a Mad Mad Mad Mad World (1963) – This is one of those movies that couldn’t be made today. Its scope was huge, every movie star on Earth at the time was in it, and it has one of the best endings you’ll ever see.


Honorable mention: Star Wars: A New Hope, The Fellowship of the Ring, Whip It, Rocky, The Sixth Sense, Golden Eye, The Birds, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Jurassic Park, Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl


Coming Soon – CMDTA’s Worst Movies of All Time

Here are the top three:

Photo of the Week - Burt and Mary

Ignore the massive head in the lower right hand side of the photo - the other characters need to introductions. Two of the most beloved characters in the history of Disney. Enough said.

Everyone Has a Favorite

Every little girl…ok most little girls dream of being a princess. Disney has made oodles of money off of this fact. Just look at the boutique in Cinderella’s Castle that will transform your daughter into princess for a small fortune. Every little girl has her favorite princess.

Do you want to know a secret? Every guy has his favorite princess too. Most men just keep that a secret or only admit to it by accident or under threat of serious harm. Take for example the stellar bravery of Corey Martin from the DIS. He freely admitted that his favorite was Aurora aka Sleeping Beauty.

Mike Scopa also displayed some true grit when he not only admitted that he has been to the Norway Princess breakfast in Epcot, but that he enjoyed it! Then again age could be catching up to him…I hope he’s not turning into one of those creepy old guys who makes all sorts of lewd comments to pretty women…Na he’s just being brave…I hope.

People who have read this blog (so no one) might think my choice would be Mary Poppins. They would be wrong for a few reasons. One: Mary Poppins is not a princess. Two: Mary Poppins is my favorite Disney character. I never said she was the most attractive. Three: Most of the time Mary Poppins shows up in the white dress which I strongly dislike.

My choice is a little different. Most people pick Cinderella. I’ve never really liked blondes (so I guess that eliminates Aurora too). I always thought Jasmine was a little skanky. I’ve always thought Ariel was barley a teenager and that’s kind of creepy. So that leaves two right (three in a few months but until she shows up in the parks she’s not in the running)? Belle or Snow White - for most people that would be a hard decision, but it’s not for me. Every time I’ve seen Snow White in the parks I’ve done a double take. I don’t know if it’s the makeup or the costume or what but she hits the top of my list. What I should say is – Snow White is German and my wife is partly German so Snow White reminds me of my wife…..yeah that’s it.

Ok now that this post has hit a record level of creepiness I’ll stop. Last thing I need is a restraining order.

HOLY POO FLINGING MONKEYS! It’s Dark Wing Duck!

When I was young the best part about going to Disney World was seeing the characters. I had the autograph book and was always on the hunt for characters I didn’t have. There is nothing wrong with that. I think most kids do that. In time you leave the autograph book at home and might get a picture or two with a character. Some people however never grow out of the character hunt period of their life. If you see a character in a park, chances are there is an adult who has a rather unhealthy obsession lurking nearby.

When it comes to characters there are some things I can and cannot do. First of all I can’t go near a face character (aka no mask). The reason for this is simple. I step out of my shoes and look at all angles. One – most face characters are attractive woman. Two – you have to be close to get a picture taken. See the problem? You normally put your arm around a character when you have your picture taken. I’d feel like a total pervert doing that with an attractive woman I didn’t know. Even though they get used to it, I bet they feel the same way. On the flip side if you stood a couple of feet away that would be even more uncomfortable because then you’d end up with an awkward photo your friends could laugh at for years.

I’d really like to know the shelf life of a face character. I bet it’s not long. I bet most of them quit or get fired. How many times can you get groped naughty kids or sketchy adults before you go bonkers and start hitting people? When you think about it, how many sweaty (or stinky for that matter) people do you have to hug before you just want to blow chunks all over the place?

The only face character that you could get me to take a picture with is Mary Poppins. Not just any Mary Poppins. It has to be the rare one. You always see Mary Poppins in the white dress with the big hat. To me that’s not Mary Poppins. Where is the Mary with the black outfit and the umbrella that’s not a sun shade? The one you see through out the movie? That’s the one I’ll take a picture with. Before you start laughing and say I have a Mary Poppins fetish, I should explain that Mary Poppins was my favorite Disney movie when I was a kid.

Normal characters are a little different. Because they have that big old mask on it’s not as creepy. Ok so maybe to some people it’s ten times as creepy but the fact is I don’t feel like a pervert getting my picture taken with them. Although for all I know the Burping Troll of Walmart could be hiding in that suit. Fact of the matter is, you don’t know. I wonder if they found a really short person or use a child for the small characters like Donald. If that’s true, image who they find to be Sully. Do the Disney HR people go around looking for freaks? Do they put out ads that say “Looking for fre…cast members! Must be under 5’, or over 6’5” tall. Must like kids and have a…felony free criminal record. Opportunity for advancement to circus performer or movie extra if you last three months.”

There is something funny I’ve found with the normal characters. People collect them, pictures of them that is (at least I hope that’s all they are collecting). There are websites dedicated to finding them. Some are easy to find while others are very rare. Some you can’t find anymore because they have been shelved and long forgotten. Like the character in the photo with this post. Who on Earth is that? I asked everyone in that picture and no one remembers.

For all the hardcore fans who haven’t been able to find Smee and Captain Hook, I can help you out. Every night about thirty minutes before the fireworks in the Magic Kingdom, they appear at the Contemporary. They lead lines of people who paid to go on the fireworks cruises. Just go to the pier at the Contemporary and you see them. Ugh…I fell like I’m feeding someone’s addiction.