New Servers at Yak and Yeti

Yak and Yeti, a restaurant in Disney’s Animal Kingdom know for its awful food, is trying to implement a new serving policy. Starting in late 2009, monkeys will be serving the food to guests. A human server will still take the orders and check in with the guests but monkeys in tuxedos will deliver the food, the bill, and bus tables.

“We really had to do something to spice the place up. The food is so bad we knew we had to change something to keep people coming in. Logically we choose monkey waiters,” a company spokesman said.

There are some issues that are being worked through before the monkeys can be released into the restaurant. Testing revealed the following issues:

- Monkeys have been eating the food while bringing it to the guests

- Some monkeys have been flinging poo when a bad tip is left

- Monkeys haven’t figured out how to use the restroom yet and have been “going” everywhere.

- Monkey fights have broken out

- Two monkeys have become alcoholics from drinking the guest’s drinks

- A rather hairy man was mistaken for a gorilla. All the monkeys started following him around.

- The monkeys thought a morbidly obese lady was a hippo and tried to ride on her back.

- Bananas can no longer be served as they never make it to the tables.

Despite the problems the project is still on track. Expect the prices at Yak and Yeti to increase greatly once the changes have been made.

Yeti Sues Disney over Breach of Contract

Last week Jose, a giant furry yeti, filed suit against the Walt Disney Company for breach of contract.

In the suit it is claimed that Jose was under contract to appear in the Expedition Everest attraction in Disney’s Animal Kingdom for which he would be housed, fed, and groomed. The suit claims that Jose was relieved from his duties because he ate an estimated three thousand dollars of food a day and was too frightening for some of the guests.

Disney responded and said the suit is frivolous and replacing Jose with a lame stuffed animal with a crummy strobe light on it was done for liability reasons. Disney also stated that Jose was offered a job in food services which he turned down.

When asked to comment Jose stated that he turned the position down because he would have been required to wear a body sized hair net which restricted his movement and was very uncomfortable. He also stated that Disney knew this and only offered the job in an effort to back out of their original contract and force him out of the company.

Opening statements for the case are currently scheduled in November.

The Animal Kingdom

I’ve heard some people claim that Disney’s Animal Kingdom is awful and that they just avoid it. Most of them feel that it’s just not “Disney” enough. Please give me a minute to find some cheese to go with your whine. I first went to Animal Kingdom the year Countdown to Extinction (now called Dinosaur) opened. I loved it. If you do not want to eat it’s a great park. It’s by far the best zoo I’ve ever been to. Oh sorry I forgot it’s not a zoo…I guess that’s why it’s accredited by the zoo people…go figure. I will admit that there is an excessive amount of junk in this park but the parts they didn’t cut corners on are nice.

Here is the good and the bad of Disney’s Animal Kingdom.

The Good:

1 – Expedition Everest: This is a great roller coaster even if you don’t like roller coasters. The only negative I’ve run into is motion sickness. I don’t have a problem with it but my wife cannot go on this more than once because of the part where it goes in reverse. One other drawback is the fact that the yeti is busted you don’t get to see him move anymore.

2 – The Safari: It’s long, it’s different, and you will see a ton of different animals. Some of the animals get very close. Sometimes the truck has to stop until an animal moves out of the way.

3 – The “Jungle Treks”: These are well designed. You get to see an amazing variety of animals. The ones that stand out the most are the mountain gorillas, the tigers, and the flying foxes. Some people think the flying foxes are creepy and gross. I like them. I’d like to have one as a pet although I really doubt they make good pets.

4 – The Tree of Life: Some people hate this icon. Others love it. I like it because of the attention to detail that went into it. It’s sheer size and the number of animals carved into it make it worth seeing.

The Bad:

1 – Dino Land: I hate this land. Everything around that awful dino roller coaster is ugly and needs to be flushed down the toilet.

2 – Yak and Yeti: Please, someone fix the food here. It’s just awful.

3 – Kali River Rapids: The two big problems with this ride are; the fact that it’s about two seconds long and you don’t just get wet you get soaked to the bone. Even if you wear a poncho you still get soaked. I don’t mind getting wet but what happens to you on this ride is excessive.

4 – It’s Tough to be a Bug: This should be a fun, upbeat 3D movie. It’s not. I don’t mind this attraction but I can understand why people don’t like it. This movie scares the young children to the point of hysteria. There is also a certain part where you get punched in the spine. That’s always fun.

Yak and YACK and Yeti

On my last trip to Disney World my wife and I used a dinning plan. Because of this we ate at a lot of places we never would have eaten at. One of those places was Yak and Yeti in the Animal Kingdom. A majority of what I had read about this restaurant was positive. For the most part they said it was the best sit down restaurant in the Animal Kingdom. For those of you who don’t know, that is a back handed complement. I think it’s the only sit down restaurant in Animal Kingdom unless you count the rainforest café outside the gate.

As you can tell from the title of this post Yak and Yeti was not an overly pleasant experience. There was some good and there was some bad.

My wife and I both ordered a drink. We both ordered some frozen fruity thing. Mine was some kind of Mango mush. That may sound bad but it was really good. If I remember right it was called a “Yak Attack.” I could have put down a number of them if they hadn’t cost nearly ten dollars a pop. I can’t remember what my wife ordered (maybe the Everest Avalanche) but I know why she picked it. Our waiter described it as having the most alcohol of any drink available inside a Disney World theme park. I don’t know how true that is but at least it tasted good.

For appetizers I got the Pork Pot Stickers. I ordered them pan seared as I hoped this would make them somewhat crispy. I was wrong. They tasted ok buy they were chewy and had an unpleasant consistency. The texture reminded me of soggy celery. My wife ordered the Wok Fried Green Beans. Those were very good. Only problem I had with them was I kept thinking I was at a TGI Fridays. They were the same. I think the chef had eaten their and decided to rip them off.

My main course was the Duck with Anandapur Glaze. It sounded good and I figured for $21.99 (I didn’t pay that I was on a dinning plan) it should be. As I started to eat it the thought occurred to me “Thank God this duck was dead when they started because they KILLED it again!” It was awful. I’d never had duck jerky before. To call this jerky is an insult to jerky. Leather is a more accurate description. I don’t think the meat could have been any tougher. If I had dentures I would have asked the waiter for a side of Fixodent. The stir fried vegetables it came with were tasteless. Overall it was AWFUL!

My wife ordered the baby back ribs. They were good and for the most part tender. The glaze wasn’t bad. There were only two problems. One we had eaten at the Hoop Dee Doo Review the night before. Anyone who has eaten there knows that you will be ruined after eating there. The ribs are the best I’ve ever had. So the ribs at Yak and Yeti just didn’t compare. The second problem is you need a second stomach to finish them. This is an entire order of ribs. We’re talking Fred Flintstone style meat. It would be nice to have had an option of a half rack so you don’t kill yourself trying to finish the $22.99 monstrosity in front of you.

Since we were on the dinning plan we ordered desert. The mango pie was very good although I wouldn’t mix it with a mango drink. There was just too much mango between the two.

The theming of Yak and Yeti was ok and just ok. They put up a bunch of exotic posters and a few statues and called it a day. Compared to other Disney World restaurants it was lacking.

By far Yak and Yeti was the low spot of our vacation when dining is considered. I’d rather eat a real Yak than go back there. I can’t think of any other place that had a worse food item or theming. At least the waiter was nice and attentive.