I truly believe the following conversation took place at Disney before production of Prince of Persia started filming:
Joe - Handsome actor for our hero?
Jim - Check!
Joe - Attractive actress for our strong willed leading lady?
Jim - Check!
Joe - Exotic location?
Jim - Check!
Joe - Excessive amounts of special effects?
Jim - Check!
Joe - Good compelling story?
Jim - ...
Joe - Good compelling story?!?
Jim - Well...we have a story.
Joe - What do you mean?!?
Jim - Well it looks like we gave a rabid monkey a pen and told him to go at it but we have a story.
Joe - Well maybe everything else will make up for it...
I think you get the point. Prince of Persia will hold your attention for about ten minutes and then you'll you think to yourself "this is just awful."
I think I discovered who could make it thorough this movie without being outraged after. The deaf. If you couldn't hear this movie, subtitles were not an option, and you could make up the story based on what you were seeing it might be less painful.
I'd go into more detail about the story and performances but it's just not worth it. I have no desire to waste your time. If you want to read about it go check out Wikipedia.
I don't think we'll see many more movies like this come out of Disney. After Prince of Persia, Mars Needs Moms, and The Sorcerers Apprentice, I think Disney has learned that they need a story if their movie is going to be successful.
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Monday, April 25, 2011
Brazil Coming to World Showcase?
If you have not heard by now there is a report coming out of Brazil that Disney will be adding that country to the World Showcase in Epcot.
Let me start by saying that as of now this is a rumor. If you've been following Disney news for at least the last few years you know that these rumors surface every so often. Don't put too much faith in this story yet.
The only thing this rumor has going for it is the fact it's coming out of it's home country. Most of the time we hear rumors about a country not a rumor coming from a major news source in that country.
Don't be surprised that Disney has refused the to confirm the rumor be surprised they didn't deny the rumor. Before you get excited keep in mind that by not denying the rumor Disney is getting free publicity.
As far as I'm concerned new countries coming to world showcase are like Duke Nukem Forever. It's been coming for as long as anyone can remember, there has been more close calls then anyone can count, and multiple parties have been involved. One big difference though, the Duke is back in a little over a month...at least that's what they are claiming.
Let me start by saying that as of now this is a rumor. If you've been following Disney news for at least the last few years you know that these rumors surface every so often. Don't put too much faith in this story yet.
The only thing this rumor has going for it is the fact it's coming out of it's home country. Most of the time we hear rumors about a country not a rumor coming from a major news source in that country.
Don't be surprised that Disney has refused the to confirm the rumor be surprised they didn't deny the rumor. Before you get excited keep in mind that by not denying the rumor Disney is getting free publicity.
As far as I'm concerned new countries coming to world showcase are like Duke Nukem Forever. It's been coming for as long as anyone can remember, there has been more close calls then anyone can count, and multiple parties have been involved. One big difference though, the Duke is back in a little over a month...at least that's what they are claiming.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
CMDTA's - Cruise Tips
Here are some tips for everyone considering taking a cruise. Most apply to all cruise lines.
If you have a choice take the late dinner – The early dinner is comical. All the old fogies line up and can’t wait to get in. There are tons of rug rats at this seating too. If you don’t like who you’re seated with tell your waiter. You have an out because it’s your honeymoon. If it’s freestyle seating do not go to dinner before eight at night.
Skip the Vegas Shows – they talk them up but they stink. They really stink. I don’t think stink is a strong enough word to describe them but I’m trying to keep things clean. The cheese factor is through the roof. All the other shows are great. On the night of the Vegas shows the hot tubs are empty. The hot tubs near the pool bars are the best ones. It’s normally cool and breezy too.
Kids aren’t allowed in the hot tubs or pool in the gym area. The gym area is a kid free zone. There are sometimes other pools are areas where kids are not allowed too.
You can’t take booze back to your room…if they see it. There is a booze check in desk if your getting back on the boat during a busy time you might be able walk right by it. You can also buy booze in odd containers that sometimes will get you through.
Most cruise lines allow you to bring a liter or two of soda. Ginger ale is a good one. Now because it can help with an upset stomach but because you can empty it and fill it with scotch, bourbon, whisky, or other golden liquids.
Even though you just drove or flew for hours smile non-stop until you are on the boat. They take your picture at least twice before you get on. Once is for your cruise card. If you’re not smiling then, security will see it for the rest of the cruise. They take your picture at every stop and a few of the dinners too. They post them all in the gallery so make sure to get down there and take them down. Plus you get to see all the freaks on the ship too.
Put a bathing suit and sunscreen in your carry on. You might not see you luggage until 8 or 9 pm depending on where you are located on the boat.
The fire drill is not optional.
Kids are not allowed on the tops optional desk (don’t ask).
If you’ve never seen a purple sunburn, you will.
If you’ve never seen a fat guy in a speedo, you will.
If you’ve never seen someone so drunk they can’t tell what floor they are on, you will.
If you think it’s impossible to gain ten pounds in a week, guess again.
The 24 hour pizza bar (carnival only) has really good pizza.
The midnight buffet is nice to look at but only the heavy hitters can eat that late.
Only drunks and fatty Mcfatties go to the late night crape buffet which makes it some of the best entertainment available.
It’s possible to eat at anytime and if you manage to eat one item of food for 24 hours straight you should get a trophy.
Beware of the pillow chocolates. Many people (yours truly included) have fallen asleep on them after a late night. Yes they do melt.
If you have a choice take the late dinner – The early dinner is comical. All the old fogies line up and can’t wait to get in. There are tons of rug rats at this seating too. If you don’t like who you’re seated with tell your waiter. You have an out because it’s your honeymoon. If it’s freestyle seating do not go to dinner before eight at night.
Skip the Vegas Shows – they talk them up but they stink. They really stink. I don’t think stink is a strong enough word to describe them but I’m trying to keep things clean. The cheese factor is through the roof. All the other shows are great. On the night of the Vegas shows the hot tubs are empty. The hot tubs near the pool bars are the best ones. It’s normally cool and breezy too.
Kids aren’t allowed in the hot tubs or pool in the gym area. The gym area is a kid free zone. There are sometimes other pools are areas where kids are not allowed too.
You can’t take booze back to your room…if they see it. There is a booze check in desk if your getting back on the boat during a busy time you might be able walk right by it. You can also buy booze in odd containers that sometimes will get you through.
Most cruise lines allow you to bring a liter or two of soda. Ginger ale is a good one. Now because it can help with an upset stomach but because you can empty it and fill it with scotch, bourbon, whisky, or other golden liquids.
Even though you just drove or flew for hours smile non-stop until you are on the boat. They take your picture at least twice before you get on. Once is for your cruise card. If you’re not smiling then, security will see it for the rest of the cruise. They take your picture at every stop and a few of the dinners too. They post them all in the gallery so make sure to get down there and take them down. Plus you get to see all the freaks on the ship too.
Put a bathing suit and sunscreen in your carry on. You might not see you luggage until 8 or 9 pm depending on where you are located on the boat.
The fire drill is not optional.
Kids are not allowed on the tops optional desk (don’t ask).
If you’ve never seen a purple sunburn, you will.
If you’ve never seen a fat guy in a speedo, you will.
If you’ve never seen someone so drunk they can’t tell what floor they are on, you will.
If you think it’s impossible to gain ten pounds in a week, guess again.
The 24 hour pizza bar (carnival only) has really good pizza.
The midnight buffet is nice to look at but only the heavy hitters can eat that late.
Only drunks and fatty Mcfatties go to the late night crape buffet which makes it some of the best entertainment available.
It’s possible to eat at anytime and if you manage to eat one item of food for 24 hours straight you should get a trophy.
Beware of the pillow chocolates. Many people (yours truly included) have fallen asleep on them after a late night. Yes they do melt.
Saturday, April 16, 2011
There's No Booze at Disneyland...Oh Wait Yes There Is...
It's well known that there is no booze at the Magic Kingdom or Disney Land. However, that's not really true.
Many people don't know you can get booze at Disney Land. Sure you can't just walk up to your average dining location and get booze but you can still get booze in Disney Land.
There is a certain special place that most people can't go to. A magical place that keeps the average person out and only lets in the elite. A certain place called Club 33.
You can find out a fair amount about Club 33 by just doing a Google search but those sites might not tell you that this is the only place in Disney Land that serves booze.
Sure it totally goes against everything Walt Disney believed in but who cares Disney makes big bucks off it.
If you don't like the fact that Disney is making money while ignoring one of Walt's biggest pet peeves, do yourself a favor. Buy some Disney stock. Then you can be more concerned about Disney making huge profits instead of sticking to tradition.
Many people don't know you can get booze at Disney Land. Sure you can't just walk up to your average dining location and get booze but you can still get booze in Disney Land.
There is a certain special place that most people can't go to. A magical place that keeps the average person out and only lets in the elite. A certain place called Club 33.
You can find out a fair amount about Club 33 by just doing a Google search but those sites might not tell you that this is the only place in Disney Land that serves booze.
Sure it totally goes against everything Walt Disney believed in but who cares Disney makes big bucks off it.
If you don't like the fact that Disney is making money while ignoring one of Walt's biggest pet peeves, do yourself a favor. Buy some Disney stock. Then you can be more concerned about Disney making huge profits instead of sticking to tradition.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Movies You Didn't See: Secretariat
Secretariat was a modest success in the theaters. It didn't make a ton of money, it wasn't in 3D, and it wasn't loaded with sex and violence. All of those factors mean not many people saw it.
Was it worth seeing?
Let me put it this way. Secretariat was one of the five best films of 2010. The acting was top notch. The screenplay did an amazing job capturing the story, and the excitement level was great. This movie will tug at your heart, it'll make you laugh, cry, and in the end cheer.
I know a lot of people didn't see this movie because they knew the story. I thought that too before I saw this film. Chances are if you have not seen this film or read the book, you do not know the story.
The story of Secretariat consists of far more than just the last horse who won the triple crown. There are a lot of side stories and details that make this an amazing story.
Secretariat is on par with Miracle (another movie no one saw) and the Blindside. If you haven't see it yet. Rent this movie! You'll be glad you did.
Was it worth seeing?
Let me put it this way. Secretariat was one of the five best films of 2010. The acting was top notch. The screenplay did an amazing job capturing the story, and the excitement level was great. This movie will tug at your heart, it'll make you laugh, cry, and in the end cheer.
I know a lot of people didn't see this movie because they knew the story. I thought that too before I saw this film. Chances are if you have not seen this film or read the book, you do not know the story.
The story of Secretariat consists of far more than just the last horse who won the triple crown. There are a lot of side stories and details that make this an amazing story.
Secretariat is on par with Miracle (another movie no one saw) and the Blindside. If you haven't see it yet. Rent this movie! You'll be glad you did.
Friday, April 8, 2011
Disney Announces New Theme Parks
Now that the new Shanghai Disney press conference is over Disney has announced plans for additional theme park resorts.
"With better than expected interest in our new Shanghai location we decided the time was perfect to announce further theme parks. After all it's best to strike while the iron is hot," stated Disney's head of corporate expansion, the Big Bad Wolf.
The new locations announced today are all in areas that Disney views as "expansionary" areas which some experts dispute.
"Mogadishu, Baghdad, and Kabul are hardly "expansionary" areas. To call those three places third world cesspools would be to compliment them," explained Universal's resident expert King Kong.
Disney is expected to involve local culture and history in the creation of all three parks. For example at Mogadishu you'll be able to ride on a new thrill ride "Pirates of Somalia." Baghdad Disney will include an educational Circle Vision 360 film entitled "Oil - Why People Live in the Desert." In Kabul Disney guests will be able to enjoy the thrilling 3D movie "101 Fun Facts About Opium."
The new theme parks are expected to open by the fall of 2199 and a one day ticket based on inflation and Disney's current pricing history should be around $32,000.
"With better than expected interest in our new Shanghai location we decided the time was perfect to announce further theme parks. After all it's best to strike while the iron is hot," stated Disney's head of corporate expansion, the Big Bad Wolf.
The new locations announced today are all in areas that Disney views as "expansionary" areas which some experts dispute.
"Mogadishu, Baghdad, and Kabul are hardly "expansionary" areas. To call those three places third world cesspools would be to compliment them," explained Universal's resident expert King Kong.
Disney is expected to involve local culture and history in the creation of all three parks. For example at Mogadishu you'll be able to ride on a new thrill ride "Pirates of Somalia." Baghdad Disney will include an educational Circle Vision 360 film entitled "Oil - Why People Live in the Desert." In Kabul Disney guests will be able to enjoy the thrilling 3D movie "101 Fun Facts About Opium."
The new theme parks are expected to open by the fall of 2199 and a one day ticket based on inflation and Disney's current pricing history should be around $32,000.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Song of the South Review
I recently saw Song of the South for the first time but before I get into the movie itself I should explain how I saw it.
I don't own a VCR anymore. Currently the only official copies of Song of the South are on VHS. You can still find some copies of those online.
How did I see Song of the South without a VCR? I watched it on DVD. It's well know that Disney has not released Song of the South on DVD but when searching online the other day I stumbled upon a website that was selling it on DVD. I bought a copy figuring I had to see what was going on here. I thought maybe it was an import or something like that.
A week later the the DVD arrived. It had all the artwork you'd expect but no booklet. It also had a purple surface, a sure sign that it was a bootleg.
When I played the movie the quality wasn't bad but it was obviously not a remastered video. It wasn't even in wide screen which tipped me off as to what makers of this DVD did. They simply ripped a VHS copy to DVD and touched it up a bit.
I cannot recommend purchasing any "DVD" of Song of the South. These DVDs are not from Disney and they are all bootlegs. Stay away.
Now the movie.
To be honest I was shocked that there is so much controversy in regards to Song of the South. The movie is simply an old school movie that reflected many of the views of the days. In fact there was only one scene that I shook my head at. The infamous tar baby scene. What shocked my was the fact they called the dummy made of tar a tar baby. It seems like there should have been dozens of things they could have called the dummy instead of tar baby.
Other than that one scene you'll run into the typical 1930s racial standards. It is upsetting if you take it out of context but I don't see why it's fare to hold things that are 50+ years old to todays standards. We wouldn't do that to anything else so why would you do it to movies?
Ignoring the racial aspects of Song of the South the movie is charming. Many of the stories will make you smile. You'll really enjoy this movie if you are a fan of Splash Mountain. You can what scenes they used and how they tweaked them to make them fit into the ride. In fact this movie is a must see for any Splash Mountain fan.
I'd say Song of the South isn't for everyone but it is a good movie that has been unfairly black listed. I say that because Dumbo, the Three Little Pigs, and many of the old school Disney cartoons are loaded with racist themes but no one talks about them.
I don't own a VCR anymore. Currently the only official copies of Song of the South are on VHS. You can still find some copies of those online.
How did I see Song of the South without a VCR? I watched it on DVD. It's well know that Disney has not released Song of the South on DVD but when searching online the other day I stumbled upon a website that was selling it on DVD. I bought a copy figuring I had to see what was going on here. I thought maybe it was an import or something like that.
A week later the the DVD arrived. It had all the artwork you'd expect but no booklet. It also had a purple surface, a sure sign that it was a bootleg.
When I played the movie the quality wasn't bad but it was obviously not a remastered video. It wasn't even in wide screen which tipped me off as to what makers of this DVD did. They simply ripped a VHS copy to DVD and touched it up a bit.
I cannot recommend purchasing any "DVD" of Song of the South. These DVDs are not from Disney and they are all bootlegs. Stay away.
Now the movie.
To be honest I was shocked that there is so much controversy in regards to Song of the South. The movie is simply an old school movie that reflected many of the views of the days. In fact there was only one scene that I shook my head at. The infamous tar baby scene. What shocked my was the fact they called the dummy made of tar a tar baby. It seems like there should have been dozens of things they could have called the dummy instead of tar baby.
Other than that one scene you'll run into the typical 1930s racial standards. It is upsetting if you take it out of context but I don't see why it's fare to hold things that are 50+ years old to todays standards. We wouldn't do that to anything else so why would you do it to movies?
Ignoring the racial aspects of Song of the South the movie is charming. Many of the stories will make you smile. You'll really enjoy this movie if you are a fan of Splash Mountain. You can what scenes they used and how they tweaked them to make them fit into the ride. In fact this movie is a must see for any Splash Mountain fan.
I'd say Song of the South isn't for everyone but it is a good movie that has been unfairly black listed. I say that because Dumbo, the Three Little Pigs, and many of the old school Disney cartoons are loaded with racist themes but no one talks about them.
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