CMDTA’s 1st Annual Disney Podcast Awards

I know there are some legitimate podcast awards out there.  Those are no fun.  I’m doing podcast awards my way.  You won’t find your normal categories on this list.  In fact no one else does a Disney Podcast Award (I think).

The “I thought they died” Award:

This one was tough.  Annette Owens took a big break from WDW Today.  Most years she’d walk away with this award except Van from Netcot only put out a couple episodes this year. Congrats Van! I thought you were dead!

Best Rant

In this category Pete Werner from the DIS Unplugged is nominated…about 15 times. So it’s Pete vs. Himself!  I guess that takes the suspense out of who wins but not for what!  Pete wins for his rant on the “Sick Show.” He was the only person on that episode and he still took the time to do a rant!  Now there is an example of going above and beyond.

Goofiest Guest

In terms of Disney – It’s good to be Goofy!  Out of all the countless guests, who was the goofiest?  The award goes to Tim “Bananas” Foster on the WDW Radio show.  What can you say?  The guy sounds like a dufus and he is a major deek.  Of course I mean that in a good way.

Award for the Podcast with the Most inside Jokes

The winner by a massive margin is WDW Today! When you have to check the wiki at least once in every podcast you know there are a lot of inside jokes.  Arrrgh MONGELLO!!!

Best New Personality Not on Their Own Show or Own Segment for that Matter

Congrats Princess Lisa!  It’s good to know someone is keeping Skipper Ben in line.

Award for the Most Insane Episode

You’d think WDW Today would win this one.  You would be wrong.  This goes to Inside the Magic for its year end review. It clocked in at over five hours. FIVE HOURS! Some people don’t sleep that long at night.

Podcaster Most Likely to be Caught Picking His Nose on a Ride

The first name that comes to mind is Lou Mongello.  However, Lou loves to eat and that’s just gross so this award goes to Len Testa!  Congrats Len!

Most Addicted Podcaster

Ricky Brigante for his Haunted Mansion addiction!  Don’t be surprised if he dies on this attraction while trying to set the consecutive ride record.

The Odd Couple Award

Who doesn’t love an odd combo?  Even the Disney Podcast Community has one.  Congrats Jim Hill and Nathan Rose from the Magical Definitions Podcast!

Most Likely to Die a Death Somehow Related to Van Halen While in a Disney Park

Do I even have to say this one?  Congrats Len Testa!

Most Likely to be Mistaken for the Yeti

Congrats Mike Scoppa!  Most people don’t know this but if you shave the Yeti you find he’s Mike Scoppa’s long lost brother.

Disney to Ban Ugly People from Its Parks During 2011

In a shocking move Disney has banned ugly people from its parks for 2011. In a press release that no one saw or read, Disney stated that their new promotion “Let the Memories Begin” was a little short sighted.

“We didn’t realize until it was too late the impact this promotion could have,” stated Disney spokes-animal King Louie.

He went on to explain “We told everyone that if they were in the parks there would be a chance their picture could be displayed where everyone could see it.  We forgot that there are some who fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.”

While testing the technology Disney discovered that unless they filtered the photos to remove some people, it actually drove people away.  They also discovered that they could influence the crowds by posting certain photos. 

Here were the results they observed when posting certain photos:

The Cousin Mickey Doesn’t Talk About – People became physically ill and children started crying.  Some people fled the parks in terror.

Lou Mongello – People ate everything that wasn’t nailed down and loved everything.  In fact there was not one complaint about food while his photo was posted.

Len Testa – Everyone stopped waiting in line and started following different pre-printed plans. For some odd reason, tequila sales increased by 1,000,000% during this timeframe.

Mike Scopa – Everyone signed up for the next marathon and starting giving people with young children dirty looks.

Matt Hochberg – Dinosaur shut down due to lack of interest. Animal Kingdom posted a record low attendance and DHS had to shut the gates because it hit its capacity.

Van @ Netcot – Everyone started reciting their top seven favorite things in Disney World.

Jim Hill – Blu-Ray sales dropped and digital copy sales skyrocketed.

Nathan Rose – Blu-Ray sales skyrocketed and digital copy sales plummeted.

Pete Werner – People went on rants about random subjects.  Cast members were lauded for their hard work or lambasted for not caring.

Ricky Brigante – In one hour, guest relations received 100,000 requests for Alien Encounter to be brought back.  There were also a ton of requests for all Halloween celebrations to be made permanent.

If the ban remains in place a class action lawsuit can be expected.  Already a new group has been formed in response to the ban.  “Ugly People Outraged Over Prejudices” (UPOOP) has already collected over 20,000 signatures and is planning a large scale protest.

Only time will tell if the ban remains in effect.

I hope this goes without saying but this is a fake news story.  King Louie is not a Disney spokes-animal.  Orangutans can’t even talk.  None of the test results (except the CMDTA one) are true. Please do not try to join UPOOP.  It does not exist.