Just when you thought Disney had done everything it could to tell the average Joe that he wasn’t important, they went and announced “Golden Oaks.”
To be honest I was offended when I heard Disney was building a development for the uber rich. If Walt was alive he’d be fuming mad right now. Was it just me or didn’t he want Disney World to be for families and a place everyone could enjoy? I didn’t think he wanted it as playground for the rich.
I’ve come up with a way to ruin Disney’s plan. It’s a rather simple plan – A hundred or so of us pool our money, buy one of the homes, and make it a giant pirate lair.
Have you ever had a bad neighbor? We’d redefine what a bad neighbor is. Pirates don’t cut the lawn. They pass out in the yard. They keep random livestock. They brew grog in the back yard. They have noisy parties all night long. You also have to remember – Pirates have cannons.
Let’s see how long property values stay steady when we set the cannon off every morning when the sun rises.
Don’t think of this a waste of money. This would be an investment. We’d sell tickets for the parties to vacationers. We’d also sell tickets during the day just to tour an actual pirate lair. We’d also pillage the nearby homes after they are abandoned because of our shenanigans.
So let’s recap – Disturbing the peace, corrupting the public, theft, destruction of property, public drunkenness, and keeping livestock in a residential area. I think Walt would approve!
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